Sunday, August 30, 2009

shell here..

we had stake conferene today. the children's choir sang, "families can be together forever." the whole theme was about temples. i think this is what is going to get me through this...

a quote was mentioned that i really liked by thomas s. monson:
"where is heaven? it's not very far when you're in the temple... it's right where you are."

at conference they also talked about taking a picture of your kids each year at the temple and displaying it in their rooms. and also a picture of our prophet.
Barb here: I read this thought today and wanted to share it with you.

President Harold B Lee: Don't be afraid of the testing and trials of life. Sometimes when you are going through the most severe test, you will be nearer to God than you have any idea, for like the experience of the Master himself... in the Garden of Gethsemane, and on the cross of Calvary, the scriptures record, "And behold, angels came and ministered him." (Matt 4:11) Sometimes, that may happen to you in the midst of your trials.

You can expect it, Shell!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

I know we are missing a very important member of this family. Landon J. I want to tell everyone who reads this blog how thankful we are for your continued support for Shelley. I so loved Shelley's testimony she shared on here and her ability to stay close to the spirit and follow it.
What would we do without the gospel and our knowledge at hard times like this?
I want Shelley to know:
I love you.
I think you are the most wonderful person in the world. We ALL feel you are our favorite person to be around. The great amount of joy that you bring into my life is such a blessing as a daughter and friend. Please remember that with God nothing is impossible!
Love always, your mom.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

update on me......Shelley

My heart is so full. I feel the the peace and comfort that only comes from the gift of the Holy Ghost. I know that Heavenly Father loves me. I know He has not forgotten us. I feel His love each day. each minute. I know that my Jordan is with loved ones and is busy doing the Lords work. I also feel him here helping me explain things to our kids.

Last night I had a dream... Jordan and I were in a small space of some kind I asked him if he could give me a blessing and he said no I can't, I'm on a mission. He was glowing and his eyes were red... like he'd been crying.

I went upstairs and found Chantel still in bed but awake. I said, "Chantel guess what? I had a dream about daddy last night!" She sat right up in bed and said, "Me too mom! He smiled at me and so did uncle Jed and Grandpa Mingo."

It was a sweet experience. I have had too many tender mercies to doubt..... I know that Heavenly Father lives, and I am so thankful to my older brother, Jesus Christ, that he made it possible so that we can be an eternal family!!!!!

If you are looking for something to boost your spirits, read Alma 13. After I read that, I was at the temple, I felt so much peace. It helped me to understand what Jordan is doing... I'm so glad I was lucky enough to be married to him. After we got home from the temple, I opened my scriptures to that page of Alma 13 and on the top right corner years ago I wrote, " WHATS MY MISSION?" This has been on my mind a lot lately. Another tender mercy. I know my first thing is to be a good mom to my kids and the rest, well, I guess I will let the Lord guide me. It's worked so far.... Thanks again for all your love and support and prayers.......Shelley

Maybe we can win!
















THIS for Shelley.
Isn't it awesome?
It is a Madsen Cycle.
Also called a bucket bike.
And they are having a give away.
So to enter this blog in the contest...and of course, win the bike for Shelley and her little peeps,
be sure to click over to their site...and see more about these great bikes.
Oh - and go to their blog to see the bike in action.
(Scroll down through all the video posts)

Hey, and if you want...you could do like I am doing on my personal blog, (or twitter or Facebook) and enter to win, and just if'n you wanted you could 'gift' your win to Shelley....just saying....or keep it for yourself.
Either way.
Great cycle.
Great contest.
Some lucky winner.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Monday, August 24, 2009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JORDAN!!!

T o d a y i s J o r d a n 's B i r t h d a y ! I just wanted him to know how much we miss him and love him. Something great that I really admire about Jordan was that he was
H O N E S T and F A I T H F U L!!!


Mormon, speaking of the converted Lamanites who were known as the people of Anti-Nephi-Lehi, wrote: “And they were among the people of Nephi, and also numbered among the people who were of the church of God. And they were also distinguished for their zeal towards God, and also towards men; for they were perfectly honest and upright in all things; and they were firm in the faith of Christ, even unto the end” (Alma 27:27; emphasis added).


Jordan you were perfectly honest, you were upright in all things and you were firm in your faith in Christ...even unto the end of your earth life! Your a great example to us all! Thank You!


We love you Shelley, Chantel, Mason and Landon! Hope you have a good day on this special day of Jordan's!! Thinking of you today and always!


Hugs and Kisses!

Rachel (shelley's sis)

Do we believe in angels?


Arlene here:
One doesn't have to look very far to find the answer.

Thank goodness.

“President Joseph F. Smith suggested that it is possible that our departed loved ones may be sent to help us who yet live on earth. Our fathers and mothers, brothers, sisters and friends who have passed away from this earth, having been faithful, and worthy to enjoy these rights and privileges, may have a mission given them to visit their friends and relatives upon the earth again, bringing from the divine presence messages of love, of warning, of reproof or instruction, to those whom they had learned to love in the flesh.” (Gospel Doctrine , p. 436)

Friday, August 21, 2009

It is called the Plan of Happiness

Arlene here:
Some thoughts:
Do you know anyone that has 'lost' someone?
I do.
Whether it be a baby, a spouse, a Mom, a Dad...
A dear friend.

We all lose people - to death.
Death is part of living.

Have you lost someone?
I have.

Sometimes we lose 'things'.
Like health, or jobs, or security.
Sometimes we lose mobility, or function.
Or a relationship comes to an end.

Truth be known, we all do.

Part of living - is losing.

But....
It is called the Plan of Happiness.

So yesterday while sitting in the temple.
(Holiness to the Lord - House of the Lord)
I chuckled.

That is right - I chuckled.
It was a quiet reverent little chuckle..but I chuckled.

The thought that came was.
"Shelley, (the Mingo families) will chuckle, again.
They will laugh."

It is called the Plan of Happiness.
(It is not the plan of grief, lonliness, sorrow.)

Be it soon or late.
Chuckles will come.
Laughter, happiness.

I pray it will be soon - more than late.
It is called the Plan of HAPPINESS.
To have Happiness is the Plan.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Grandma and Shelley

Sisters


The family.
Dad
Mom.
Jed.
Jordan.
And five amazing sisters.





Here they are with Shelley.
They lost a Papa and both brothers.

"Is solace anywhere more comforting than in the arms of a sister."

I will let these pictures do the talking today.

Arlene here:

















































































God be with you till we meet again.
By His counsels guide uphold you.
With his sheep securely fold you.
God be with you till we meet again.

When life's perils thick confound you.
Put his arms unfailing round you

GOD BE WITH YOU TILL WE MEET AGAIN
Till we meet at Jesus' feet.

(Thanks to Barb for the pictures.)

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

I am happy but I am sad.

Arlene here:
I really thought this blog has 'run it's course'.
But
I feel like I want to just post a bit more.

First of all - THANK YOU to all those who have sent memories and to Heritage Makers for helping us put together a book for Jordan's littles. (Yes, they are donating the service, amazing, huh?)
The vision is - we will keep every word you have shared - in just a binder, and then take favorite snippets and combine those with favorite pictures to make a really wonderful storybook.

Yesterday I thought 'things' were better.
But today knowing it is the funeral and not being there,
Has rendered me useless once again.
I have worn out my carpet pacing the hall...thinking...crying.

My sister sent notes to me after the viewing last night.
I'll share a few for those for you who, like me, couldn't attend.

Barbs words.....

Bev's Relief Society had taken dinner for the family at their home.
Twenty six people there to eat.
"The most delicious meal, ham, potatoes, the works."
Indeed, the Society of Relief.

They had a big display of pictures of all of the men, right in the foyer and a nice video going. It was lovely, gave people something to watch as they waited 1 1/2 to 2 hours to get into the room where the family was.
So many kind people.

You walk into the Primary room.
Three caskets and beautiful flowers.
Makes you feel sadder than sad.

You can't even imagine the people. Regina greeted each one - so kind and sweet.
Her daughters will be such a support to her, they are good to their Mom.

Regina and Shelley - had on their game faces, they did so good.
Sarah, Shel' step sister had people talk about Jordan on a video in another room.
She did such a good job.
That will be such a good memory for Shelley and the kids.

Ryan - Shelleys twin brother, took Channie and Mason home and fed them and played with them for a while.
They were just hungry and so tired.

It was good to see cousins and family supporting one another. Cousins that hadn't seen each other in a long time were able to talk.
I loved that.

The funeral director did such a good job of talking to all the little kids and the adults. When he was reassuring them that their spirits were still alive and that they loved them.
Channie said: "I'm happy but I am sad."


(Thanks to Diane - Shelleys good friend and 'Utah Mom' for this sweet picture)

So are we Channie...so are we.
I am sure that Jordan is having a hard time.
Imagine how sad he is to be on the other side of the veil from his family?

Andy Coats, who spoke at the Memorial service, and his family came.
He gave such a good talk at the Memorial service.
Some other Utah friends came, Shelley was really glad to see them.

Thanks Barb.
Well, I hope reading a bit about the family visitation helped you some, as it did me.

Monday, August 17, 2009

By Orson F. Whitney

No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God... and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire and which will make us more like our Father and Mother in heaven.

To bear anothers burden

Arlene here:
Meeting family and friends tonight.
Funeral and burial tomorrow.
Oh.
So hard.
Those who have buried a loved one know that some of the hardest days are the few right after the funeral.
It all seems so final.
Then.

Even those of us with testimonies of eternal life, and a Plan of Happiness.
There IS a plan of happiness, you know?
But just for a while...we feel sad, ok?
It seems final.
The busyness of preparations is over - and the reality of getting back to life, seems hard.

Everyone (even the Mingo family) returns to their lives.
Life, in fact, demands that we do.

But we can continue to help with our prayers.
Prayers that we will be sensitive to their needs.
And have the courage to 'stop' our busy lives and respond to those needs.
Just like Jordan would do.

Have you ever been sustained by another ones prayers?
I have.
One time, in particular, I had to have a medical 'procedure' and then wait 6 hours for a follow up surgery.
To wait - just wait in the hospital for SIX hours.
Oh.
Mercy.
But, you know what?
Kind family and friends were praying for me...and I'll be jiggered.
The time literally become 'no time'.
The time was not there.
I can't describe it.
I didn't wait.
There was no time.

So from this tiny example, I know we can bear one anothers burdens - with prayer.
Could we not forget?

Yesterday little Mason in his car seat with Channie next to him said,
"Channie, maybe today we can go way way way up to heaven and see Daddy."
"See Channie there are no clouds."

May the Lord bless this sweet family - that there will be "no clouds" -
that they will feel
Our Saviors Love shine like the sun with perfect light.
Breaking through clouds of strife.

And may our love - and prayers - help
as we share to bear their burdens
and mourn with those who mourn.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Heritage Makers

Arlene here:
Heritage Makers :
Is a wonderful company that is in the business of preserving stories.
They are a storybooking company.

"We can help you record all of your precious memories before they slip away."

Chris Crandall, co-founder, has contacted us and is willing to help us make that big fat yummy book of memories.
Now, how surprising and wonderful and nice and kind and great is that?

Thrilling.
Truly a gift that will become more precious with each passing year.

One last plea...to send entries for this book.
You can be part of this book of memories.
(and thank you to those who have already sent memories - reflections and pictures)
Pictures - memories.
Family - friends - missionary companions - high school acquaintances - fellow workers - please send via email or snail mail.
Send them to me... arlenemccomas@gmail.com

p.s. We all have precious memories to preserve.
Heritage Makers has many options available to do just that.
Thank - you Heritage Makers.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Will Sunday really come?

Arlene here:
Of course it will.
Absolutely.
The Sunday of which I speak, is that Sunday of rest.
Rejoicing.
Happiness.

And I believe - we have those mini-Sunday's - every week, for a reason.
As a reminder of that glorious Sunday.
The Sunday of Sundays, if you will.

In fact, tomorrow is A Sunday.
Elder Joseph B Wirthlin spoke after his wife died.

At the beginning of the talk...
We hear of his heart wrenching grief.
Even mighty men of God
Experience grief.
Heart wrenching grief.
Did you know?

He shares this:
"When President Hinckley spoke at Sister Wirthlin’s funeral, he said that it is a devastating, consuming thing to lose someone you love. It gnaws at your soul."

Devastating - consuming - gnaws at your soul.
He knows, huh?
He really knows.
He, in fact, knows better than I know...but he knows what Shelley knows.

He continues:
"In the lonely hours I have spent a great deal of time thinking about eternal things.
I have contemplated the comforting doctrines of eternal life."

Contemplating, indeed.
Trying to wrestle meaning out of all of this.

Then his talk ends with this:
"But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—
Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow
Sunday will come.
No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, Sunday will come. In this life or the next, Sunday will come.
That we may always know that no matter how dark our Friday,
Sunday will come
is my prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

So the begging question is -
What happened in the middle of his talk?
How did he get from gnawing grief to - no matter our desperation, no matter our grief
Sunday will come.

He describes what happened as he contemplated the comforting doctrine:

"Think of how dark that Friday was when Christ was lifted up on the cross.
On that terrible Friday the earth shook and grew dark.
Frightful storms lashed at the earth. Mary Magdalene and Mary, the mother of Jesus, were both overcome with grief and despair.....
On that Friday the Apostles were devastated.....

It was a Friday filled with devastating, consuming sorrow that gnawed at the souls of those who loved and honored the Son of God.

...The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.

And in an instant the eyes that had been filled with ever-flowing tears dried. The lips that had whispered prayers of distress and grief now filled the air with wondrous praise, for Jesus the Christ, the Son of the living God, stood before them as the firstfruits of the Resurrection, the proof that death is merely the beginning of a new and wondrous existence.

Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces.

We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again.

We will all have our Fridays.But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow -
Sunday will come."
(Talk in it's entirety here)

So.
What are we to do?
Tomorrow when we go to our houses of worship.
We seek to find what Joseph B Wirthlin found.

We seek to be comforted by the comforting doctrine.
We have a Savior.
He will save us from our grief.
He will save Shelley.
He saves.
Will it happen in an instant, and just be all better?
Not likely.
But can we become closer to Him whose life - gives us life eternal?
I believe so.

Jordan knew.
Jordan loved to go to church.
Jordan loved Sunday.
Jordan loved the Savior.

We can have that same Savior - in our lives.
And feel it this Sunday.
I think Jordan would like that.
For us.
For his Shelley.
I think he trusts that he doesn't have to be Shelleys Savior.
She ALREADY HAS ONE.
As do we.

Tomorrow...is A Sunday.

EVERYONES LOVE!

The Young Women and Young Men of their ward hosted a garage sale fund raiser for the Mingos today. It was well attended, and allowed people in the community a chance to show their love and support. Here is a picture of them presenting the proceeds to Shelley - $3,165!

People came ready and willing to donate. A plate of cookies and brownies were sold for $40. 25 cent items were bought for $10. So many people were wanting to help out.



Rod Works donated items.
Family donated items.
Friends donated items.

Everyone donated love.

A couple angels

I know who I am.
I know God's plan.
I WILL.
Follow Him
IN.
FAITH.

Thank you to those who spoke at the Memorial service

Matt Hodson wrote:
I was at the memorial service today and it was wonderful. The spirit was very strong there and I just wanted to convey my thanks to those that spoke as they did a wonderful job portraying the love that Jordan had for anyone he came across.

Arlene Here

There are many words coming via email.
We welcome any and all.
If you have asked me to post..I have, if not, I am editing and posting some words... but
never fear...those who have sent emails - they will be put into THE book we are making. for the family.

From Pam to Shelley

This was given to me after my husband died in a plane crash a year and a half ago. I love what it says. I hope you do too. I have it on pictures for our four kids.

"As you remember me know that I am not gone, for I am always a part of you. When you remember something that I had taught you, know that I am near. In your eyes, habits and manerisms I am there. For in you I have left me. When you are lonely and feeling down, say a little prayer for I will always hear it. And when you need a hug from me just look in the mirror and see that I am there."

Be strong. Trust God. Let your family help you. They need you to need them. You are in my prayers.

Sincerely, Pam

From Auntie Barb...I love you Seeeeeeley Sue

This was my favorite picture of you and Jordan....

Aunt Barb's journal for today.
August 14th, 2009

Thoughts on the way to Lehi, Utah:

* Jordan has people there to be with, Shelley has people here to be with. Heavenly FAther planned for us to have families, so we could help each other on both sides of the veil. Though they are not together, they are not alone.

* Mason, asleep when it came time to sing at the funeral. He was planning to sing: " My Heavenly Father loves me." We got to hear him sing that at our recent Family Reunion...he knew every word, didn't want to let go of the mike when it was over. Shelley shared today: Jordan sang Primary songs to him every night before he went to bed....5 or 6...or as many as he wanted. No wonder he knew that song!

* Prayer in my heart: that Shel would feel comforted. strong. loved. uplifted. directed. encircled in the arms of His love. (I believe my prayer was answered for her today.)

At funeral: Beautiful display of pictures, Jordan kissing Shelley on their wedding day, Jordan holding Mason. Jordan holding Chantel. Jordan holding Landon. Jordan with his dad and brother. Jordan doing things he loved. Jordan smiling. Celebrating Jordan Mingo.

Things I learned about Jordan Mingo today:

- Jordan was a "great" daddy and family member....and as Andy Coats said: "My parents were GLAD I had Jordan as a friend. He was a leader and his influence "for good" was felt by many.

- Perfectionist. While working with Andy Coats on a wood project, Andy cut a piece of wood and asked him if it was okay...he smiled and said..."Sharpen your pencil, Andy." :)

I got the feeling that he expected the best in himself and others, however, He was very kind and un-judgmental with everyone.

- Jordan had already become "famous" in his work. He had 798 contacts on his e mail list. Many of them job related. He knew how to work and was in demand. He had what it took to succeed!
He was ambitious and a hard worker.

- Jord had a good relationship with his parents. When he went home to visit, he would say: "What can I do to help you, Dad."

- Shelley said: "I know he loves me. He proved it by the way he took care of me. Recently, he worked till 4:00 in the morning, doing my "honey-do" list." She added, “Jordan never got tired.”

- Shelley and Jordan's love for each other was deep and pure. Beginning in high school and getting stronger through years of courtship.

Shelley determined when he went on his mission, to make it her mission too.

She said, " He REALLY WAS on his mission...I didn't get near enough romantic letters!:) ...but I determined to make myself grow spiritually along with him... so he would want me when he got home."

- She accomplished it! and SOON after he got home, they got married in the Salt Lake Temple. (side note: Shelley crocheted several baby blankets and sent them to him on his mission, for him to give to little babies there) She was 100% support.

- In high school, Jordan lifted (squatted?) 500 pounds. Peers marveled and cheered him on. He was a goal setter who could do“ hard things.”

- Jordan liked to win. He was competitive. Sometimes everyday things even became a competition, like, "How many pizzas could you could eat?" Hard to beat, eh, Andy?

-Jordan loved many sports. He received the Sportsmanship Award in High school Baseball. He played to win, but kept the balance. (Because so many of his high school baseball buddies were there today, he must have been a great leader among them.) He was well-respected among his peers...then and now.

-Several times mentioned today: “Jordan never complained. Even if he didn't like something, he just got in there and "got 'er done." He had a superb self-discipline, work ethic.

-Written in his missionary journal, (at end of mission): "Whatever Heavenly Father has in store for me next, I will do it. I know my Heavenly Father loves me."

Things I loved about what Shelley said:

- "I wanted to talk today because I wanted to brag about my husband. He brought happiness to me every single day. I am so thankful I could be married to him. I am so thankful for the 3 beautiful children we had together. I know they will bring me great joy and comfort throughout my life."

- " I also wanted to talk to tell Jordan that I will continue to take care of our children and teach them of Christ. I will work to have the Spirit in our home, always."

- A favorite scripture from Shelley and Jordan's "mission". Proverbs 3:5: "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding."

- "Jordan loved to laugh. He and Mason would watch Funniest Home Videos together. One time he laughed so hard, he fell off the couch."

- "There was always something Jordan wanted to learn and do.

- He never missed church. He loved to go.

- He was there for everybody."

- Shelley’s message from Chantel to everybody: "I will miss my Dad. I love him very much and I am sad."

- "I know Jordan loves me and I know we will be together again, someday."

- I have felt uplifted by your prayers. I know that that IS a literal and real thing.

- “ I know Heavenly Father is with me. I am so thankful for all that I have. I know that I will be with my family forever."

Things I learned from the Bishops talk:

* None of us will make it through life without experiencing pain. However, The Lord stands by us through all that we suffer. He will never leave us alone.

- The Lord will never give us more adversity than we can bear, (with His help.)

- John 14: "Peace I leave with you, my peace I leave with you...not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

- "He never flees or fails us."

- Because Jesus Christ walked the thorny path alone, we do not have to. He has given us help: the Atonment, the Holy Ghost, Angels, family on both sides of the veil, the Gospel of Jesus Christ."

- He has promised us..."I will not leave you comfortless."

Yes, today was a sad day. Yet...a good day and a day filled with the Spirit, of hope, a determination to be more kind, to look for the good, love my hubby, motivate myself to "be a little better", treasure each day, laugh! sing! reach out and be a positive influence for others, be happy, know that we are al in the Lords' hand and part of his great Eternal Plan. So… Trust. Have Faith and Be Thankful.

P.S. The music today was out of this world. Our "Hearts WILL go on" and indeed, we felt His love "in that very room."

From Mike McInelly





Appreciate it if you could post this to the blog, along with a few of the attached pictures:

I had the tremendous opportunity to serve with Jordan as a missionary in Argentina. He was one of the best missionaries I have ever seen. I learned so much from the kid, and love him like a brother that he is to me. I am forever grateful for the way he blessed and changed my life in the ghettos of Argentina. He was one of the most influential people during a sacred part of my life, and I will never forget him. He occupies a sacred part of my heart where very few things reside. He was special guy. I owe him so much for how he has contributed to who I am today.

I encourage all to contribute what they can. Although money will obviously never replace him, it will especially help ease the anxiety that Shelley will definitely feel as she heals and begins to look forward with her three little ones.

I love Jordan and Shelley so much. As you all know, Jordan was an incredible man, with a huge heart. Please keep the entire family in your prayers.
I feel that we owe it to Jordan and Shelley to preserve those memories of how he impacted our lives. His children will gain strength and direction as they learn about the great man who brought them to this earth. Please make the sacrifice to send your memories to the family. I am going to type mine up, and include all my mission pictures of Jordan (I have lots!)

Hope you are all doing well and finding success in your life, and staying true to the principles of success and happiness. Remember that your family is always first in life and don't let anything, or anyone persuade you from living that principle. Let the legacy help us all change and focus more on becoming better in all aspects of our lives.


Thanks Jordan for making such an impact in all of our lives. In only 26 years, you have definitely made your mark on this world.

We love you Shelley. Please, please, please let us know how we can help you! You must let us help you, it is what Jordan would want. As I told you on the phone today, anything you need at all, let me know. Time, work, food, babysitter, someone to drive something to/from Idaho, whatever. We want to help, please let us help! You have my personal cell number...

We love you,

Mike McInelly

Friday, August 14, 2009

Today - a time to preserve a memory

Arlene here:
I live a million miles away.
I may exaggerate a tad.
But it might as well be a million.

Too far to turn about (after the reunion) and attend the Memorial Service today.

Memorial: preserving the memory of a person or thing; commemorative: memorial services.

So tell me.
Tell us.
Those who couldn't attend.
Those who may forget that are only 4, 2 and 3 months.






































What
happened?
How was it?
Let us get 50 comments.
100.
Could you do that?

And while you have been attending the service - I have been reading your wonderful words, words, words.
Having my own little private memorial, if you will.

A few of those words...
"I
remember when Shelley started liking Jordan in high school, she was so GIDDY!!"

" Shelley married an AMAZING man....Jordan was the most caring, kind, gentle, thoughtful, thankful, hard working, generous man i have ever met. He was nuts about Shelley and she was nuts about him."

"Although he wasn't a man of many words he would highlight scriptures that he felt would help me. He taught me to be patient and to do the job..."

"This book is for the family, well I am proud to have just a mere couple paragraphs in my dear friend Elder Mingo's book. Know that he has touched and changed peoples lives by sharing his talents."

"We love baseball in our family....When Casey was 6 or 7 and would go out and play baseball, and do the fantasizing that all little boys do, when he came up to bat he always wanted to be Jordan Mingo. He didn't want to be Babe Ruth, or Mickey Mantle, or Mark McGwire, or anyone else on the Minco team. It was always "Jordan Mingo is coming to the plate.... I can only hope and pray that each of my sons want to be Jordan Mingo, not just in fantasy, but in real life, and follow his example. He did well."

So.
Here we are.
A day of memorial.

Please share.
Please preserve a memory.

100 comments.
Okay?

And, hey, if you haven't written a long letter to all those you love.
Those that are important in your life.
Would you do that, also?
Today.
Because.
Just one week ago - every word that Jordan recorded
Has become priceless to his loved ones.
Life is so fragile.
So fragile.


Thanks Linz

Arlene here:
Linzy - Shelleys' sister posted the post
'The night before..:"
Thanks Linzy for sharing with us.

the night before...

i just don't want to go to bed. i know for shelley, she didn't want to go to bed either. for, after tomorrow... it is half way over... once the services are over, she has to try to find "her life"... her new life. she could barely keep her eyes open tonight. there have been so many friends, family and just great neighbors lending their helping hands and support to her. i know that she is sooo grateful. we went on a little outing today... i had her to myself... :) well, she brought her phone along... so we didn't get much chatting done, cuz she has so many people calling her and just letting her know of their support. how wonderful is that? thank you.

mason (age 2) said today, "mom, i want my dad. i want to go to heaven so we can be with dad. i want to go way way up to heaven. and i want you and you and you..." i am so grateful we have the knowledge that life does not end at the grave. we will be eternal families.

i know that little kids sense things... when we were at the family reunion... on friday... about noon... mason said, "i want my daddy!" ...that was about when the accident happened.

to see my sister going through this, i just can't imagine the pain she is feeling.
the pain jordan is feeling.
he loves her sooo much. words can't describe how much he loved her. i don't know that i have seen very many couples who love each other as much as they do. they say, "actions speak louder than words" this is so true for jordan. you knew he loved her because he never stopped serving her. he made sure she was okay and happy.
jordan was the ULTIMATE father! he loves his kids. and they loved him. he never put anything before his wife or kids.
i remember when shelley and jordan were engaged (7 short weeks) and i was dating.... i remember asking jordan what he thought of the guys i was dating. i loved to ask him. i knew wanted what was best for me.
i always looked forward to seeing jordan at get-togethers... he brought with him a great spirit. a humble and loving spirit. we will miss that.
shell... i love you. i look up to you. thank you so much for being the great example you are to me. and i really mean that. you mean the world to me. when i think about how hard it might be down the road... i think... shelley can do this. she is so strong. if anyone can do this... it is shelley.
if you are wondering what you can do for shelley... send her an email... let her know (and her kids know) a memory you had of jordan... they are going to cherish those WORDS WORDS WORDS...
thanks for sharing these pictures... jodi and chris

Thursday, August 13, 2009

You can be a star.

Yip.
A star.

Tomorrow during the Family Visitation time.
10:30 -12:00 noon
In a well marked room at the church
There will be friends
Making a video.

Isn't this a great idea?

And the stars on the video are you.
So........if you'd like to stop by and leave a few words.

MORE WORDS- WORDS - WORDS.

You can.
You might even read the words you send for the book.
Or just share the words that come to your mind.
Oh.
This is such a wonderful thing.

What a great way to celebrate Jordans life.
And Jordan and Shelleys life together.
Come - celebrate.

Come - stop by and - be a star.
A star for three cute-little-precious-adorable-amazing-beautiful-angelic kids.
Who need to know, from you who know..their Daddy.
Their Papa.

What is today like?

Arlene here:
Today is Thursday.
Is it really only Thursday.
Is it already Thursday.
Tomorrow is the Memorial service for Jordan.
Tomorrow.

Many decisions have been made.
Gary - Shelleys father is busy going about taking care of the financial worries.
Did you know there are a lot of financial worries when someone dies?
A financial paperwork maze, of sorts.
(Those of you that are concerned about using that 'donate' button, don't worry..it works and
OH.
MY.
THANK you...when you contribute there - you will immediately receive an email confirming your gift.)

And this...Rons Mother - Jed and Jordans Grandma has fallen and broken her hip.
A prayer that she will be able to attend her son and grandsons funeral (in a wheelchair, of course) could sure be offered.
Can we just keep asking for you prayers?
Well...yes, we can.
You can kneel and offer just a big long prayer for the Mingos...every thought that comes your way - all your faith - all your care and concern.
Yes.
Pray for that.

Mason will sing as his Daddys service.
Little Mason will sing as his Daddys Memorial service.
How precious is that?

Perhaps this would be a good time to remind you to bring a nice big clean handkerchief.
I have attended many funerals.
I used to try and cry discreetly.
You know, dab at my tears, sit by the wall so I could turn to the wall and not show obvious sorrow.
But then I attended my Dads funeral...and an amazing thing happened.
All those people that were crying with me - gave me comfort.
They loved my Dad, too.
Those tears said.
"I love you."
Tears are a way to show you love...it is just really okay.

"Irrespective of age, we mourn for those loved and lost.
Mourning is one of the deepest expressions of pure love. It is a natural response in complete accord with divine commandment: “Thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die.” (D&C 42:45.)"


Shelley will speak...she wants Jordan to know - she is strong and can stand on her own two feet.
(YOUR PRAYERS are giving her strength, did you know that?)
I don't know exactly how that happens.
But it happens.
In a way we can't understand - God hears our prayer and then takes our faith and turns it into strength and gives it to Shelley.

Thank you.

Shelley is 'doing' the flowers for Jordans casket.
(I have a hard time typing those words 'Jordans casket'...Oh, no...can this really be true?..oh please let me take a nap and when I wake up....don't let this be true!)

Did you know Shelley does hair...she does flowers..she does hair doodads.
But more than that - she does people.
She is such a good friend.
She is so loved, as is evidenced by the sweet things you are doing.
Food - baskets of toys for her children - yummy treats from Costco.
All all all that.
(Please also write your memories and send them for our book.)

Well, the girls (Shel and her four sisters) are off to find a white dress for Chantel to wear.
She wants a white dress...she wants to look like an angel.
That, my dear little friend, will not be hard.

Did you hear about the men from Jordans work?
Jordan worked at M&R construction.
They are going to set up a rotation shift to do Shelleys' yard work for her..and any 'honey-dos' around the house.
Hey, M&R..that is AWESOME.
Hugs to you for that!

Nights are hard.
Lots of tears at night..when the sun goes down.
Those four sisters of Shelleys made special pillows for the littles and Shelley with pictures of Jordan on them - so they can take their Daddy to bed with them.
It helps.
But do you know what really helps?

Jesus.
That is right...Jesus.

He has told us ... 'Verily I say unto you, the coming of the Lord draweth nigh, and it ovetaketh the world as a thief in the night." (D&C 106:4)

Oh, I know that has reference to when Jesus comes to earth again...but I also know...He comes to us individually - as a thief in the night..and do you know what he takes as a thief.
Darkness.
That is right.
He steals away the darkness from our lives...especially at night, when we have that feeling deep in our heart, the one that makes us feel like we are in a dark and frightening cave, you know that feeling.
When it is just too quiet and too lonely and too overwhelming?

When President Hinckley spoke of the terrible loneliness that comes to those who lose the ones they love, he also promised that in the quiet of the night a still, unheard voice whispers peace to our soul: “All is well.”

Tender Mercies

Jordan took his laptop on the plane with him... it had all of their pictures on it (plus a lot of work stuff). We have been praying that the clean-up crew would find it. THEY DID!!!!
The Lord is in charge.
We are grateful for this tender mercy.

Words Words Words

Arlene here:
We want to paint a picture with words.
No - we want do more that 'one picture is worth a thousand words' we want a BIG FAT BOOK of words.

YOUR words.

What do you remember from being 4?
Or 2?
Or 3 months?
Not much, huh?

So we want to create a book.
With YOUR words.
Here is how.
Write memories, recollections, specific details....all the little things.
About Jordan.
I remember one time....
He always.....
Oh, once we were....
Those memories...lots of them.
Can't you just see this big fat yummy book full of them?
It doesn't have to be fancy - on the back of an envelope - scrawled on a napkin.
We will take it just as it comes tumbling out of your memory.

What was his smile like?
His laugh?
What do you know that made him happy?
Was he ever into mischief?
Did you ever hear his testimony?
Was he silly?
What 5 words best describe him?

Details....write in detail, his walk, his look, the way his eyes twinkled, the way he interacted with his children.
HOW WAS HE WITH HIS CHILDREN?
Oh, you can be sure, Shelley will share but we want more...a Matthew - Mark - Luke - John kind of more.
But this will be every Billy - Susan - Jon - Mary's record

Write write write
Words words words.
Then send them to me.
Email: arlenemccomas@gmail.com
Snail mail: 12609 East 25th
Spokane Valley WA 99216

You have the opportunity to write a book.
A BIG FAT yummy wonderful book.
That will be read and read and read.
By an audience of three.
Chantel, Mason, Landon.
You can BE their memory.

Now start...while the ideas start coming - start making notes, compile you thoughts, record your memories - ideas.
Words - words - words.

p.s. If you attend either the Memorial service or funeral..will you also do the same?
What were your impressions?
How did you feel when you drove up?
How did those three little children look to you?
(Imagine them reading your words at 12 - 14 -18)
They will be precious words.
What was the weather like?
Who did you see there?
What did the spirit whisper to you?
How do you see the hand of the Lord in all of this?
How was their Momma?
What feelings do you have about their Momma.
Did you feel different when you left than when you arrived?
Why?
What?
WRITE WRITE WRITE.
Lots of different people.
Lots of different words.
A wonderful gift you can -
Give to Jordan -
For his little family.

Thank you.

ALSO: Please help us spread the word.
Do you have a Facebook page or Blog
Please post this.
"Do you know someone that knew someone that knew Jordan Mingo (married to Shelley Morgan). He was killed in a plane crash. We are collecting a book of memories for the surviving children. (4,2 and 3 months) Please go to www.wherearethemingos.blogspot.com for information on how you can contirubte.
Thank-you"

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A Memorial for Jordan

The Young Men came and put 23 American flags in Shelley's yard.
Thank you!

I just feel paralyzed today

Arlene here:
Does anyone find themselves like I am?
I live in Spokane Washington.
The Mingos live in Idaho and Utah.

I feel a million miles away.
I feel like I am walking through cold molasses.
I can't imagine the grief Regina must be feeling..losing her two sons and a husband.
How are all those Mingo girls?
Losing a Dad and both their brothers?
And of course, our Shelley, losing the love-of-her-life and the Daddy to her little ones.

I feel paralyzed with grief...walking from room to room - not able to think, wondering how in the world could people be going to work and go shopping at Walmart?
I want to yell out my window.
"THERE IS A WORLD OF HURT - going on here."
"Do you know what has happened?"
"How can you be normal?"
"How can you laugh?"
How can life go on?

Of course we know it will.
We know we will find meaning and peace.
We know there are and will be experiences that will make 'going on' possible.

But.
Just for now.
Just for a little while, can I just lay on the floor
curled up in the fetal position
with a blanket over my head
and cry my face off?

I don't know the Mingos...except Jordan.
But I feel their pain, is that possible?
I feel their pain...right here in the middle of my chest.
It makes taking a deep breath hard.
I has taken a hold of my heart and mind and thoughts and rendered me useless to any sort of daily function.
I am so so so sorry.
I am so so so sad.
As..........I am sure you are, too.

And hey, if you had a spat with someone you love... go fix that, 'k?

Thank You

A big thank you goes out to the crew who found the crash site.
These pictures were taken from about 1000 ft in the air.

From Ty, Kyla, Marissa and Chandler Bodily


Dear Shelley..and Mingo family,
In this challenging time, our thoughts keep going back to Elder Hollands talk "None Were with Him" in the last General Conference. These words give us peace.

"Brothers and sisters, one of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of the Holy Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said, “I will not leave you comfortless. [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you].”"

Shel, we know the Lord will not allow you to carry this cross on your own. He will strengthen and uphold you---He has promised He would!

From Tyler and Kumari Marshall


Jordan and Shelley Mingo.

Dear Shelley,
When you told me you were pregnant with Landon, you explained that you and Jordan felt that you should not wait to grow your family. I'm glad that you followed those promptings and established your eternal family. The day of your family's reunion will be so much more full of joy with those adorable little ones. It is good to know that we are always being guided and watched over.

My family and I are not strangers to the pain and emotions you are feeling now having lost 3 brothers, one having been a young husband and father to a 7 month old son. This week was the 11th anniversary of their car accident that occurred in Idaho while they were traveling from Washington. I feel as though I am watching your family go through the same tragic roller coaster ride as we did It is still hard all these years later but easier to see the greater plan for us all. It is fun to see his son grow up with so many of his
fathers traits and qualities. Though your children may not remember him much as they grow older, he will not be forgotten in their lives. Find comfort knowing that Jordan is still with you and will never leave you.
Shelley, I know it is a long hard road ahead for you and the family.
Know you can call on us for an understanding ear and a soft shoulder.
We Love you!!
Kumari and Ty Marshall

Today is Wed

Arlene here:
That is right.
Today is Wednesday.
We have experienced a lifetime of emotions since Sunday.
Could it really only be Wednesday?

Just a week ago...we had our Jordon here.
He was getting ready for a fun fishing trip with his brother and Dad.
Plans were being made, bags packed.
Excitement building.

Shelley was planning to take all the littles to the Hilterbrand reunion.
Oh...we had fun at that reunion.
84 people!
In fact, Shelley wasn't even concerned when she didn't hear from Jordan.
He usually calls.
"I am here getting ready to take off."
"We have landed."
"We are at the Motel."
"How are you Shel?"
"How are the kids?"
"Does Landon feel better?"

But he didn't.
And Shelley wasn't alarmed.
He is okay- she felt. He is okay.
In fact, she really didn't feel like he was all that far away.

Then Sunday night..when Shel returned home and hadn't heard.
Well............we know every dark and scary road her mind went down that evening and that long terrifying night.
Many phone calls made...no, noone had heard from any of them.
What could have happened?
Did they ever even make it to the coast?
What Motel were they to stay in?
Does anyone know?
Oh.
The.
Frantic.
Panic - feelings.
Oh.
NO!
Where are they?

When the sun finally came up on Monday.
Well, you can read some of what happened at the beginning of this blog.
We started the blog as a way to keep all 84 Hilterbrands informed.
A family gathering - circling the wagons - so to speak.
Praying..sitting at the computer - leaving only briefly to drop to our knees in prayer.
Then return to follow and watch.

The blog has grown.
Your tender expressions - have changed the dynamics of this blog.
It is now a source of not just information - but strength and comfort.
Thank you.

The terrifying heartbreaking story has unfolded.
Again - THANK YOU TO THE IDAHO CIVIL AIR PATROL.
Thank you for helping our story to be one that has an end.
We are not still wondering.
We are not....living that hellish feeling of not knowing.
To know is so difficult.
But to not know, well, that would be more difficult.

A tender mercy we feel from our Loving Heavenly Father in this:
Remember...I said Shel didn't feel concern, in fact, Jordan didn't feel all that far away while she was at the reunion.
Well - he wasn't.
In fact, Shel feels that he was with her.
You see, we believe that the body and the spirit are what make the soul of man.
(read more HERE.)
That while alive here on earth - that body and spirit are united.
Much like a hand in a glove.
The glove (body) provides a place for the spirit to dwell while on earth.
Then when someone dies...the body stays here on earth - and in fact, the last gift we often give our loved ones is to care for that precious body and prepare it for burial.
BUT...the spirit. The hand within that glove LIVES ON!

That is why Shel didn't feel panic or alone at the reunion.
Jordan was there.
We believe he was there.
She felt him there.
A sweet tender mercy.
Thank you...Heavenly Father...thank you.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


Jed Mingo

These two links to share of Jed - were sent to me by Chris Garner.
Click HERE
and HERE

Jordon and his father Ron from Andy Coats


My name is Andy Coats --Jordan, Shelly, and I grew up together. My heart is broken for them and I agree with the post on the blog post that talked about how Jordan is having a hard day today too because he is sad for his wife's loss. That is how Jordan is--he loved Shelly and the kids, they were his motivation. It's a tough day for his friends too. I spoke with Nate Christiansen, Luke Coats, Ryan Jensen, and Austin Mitchell yesterday and we all want to express our heartfelt condolences for the great loss.

I attached a pic of the last time Jordan and I went golfing.
(Ron and he are in the front seat of the front golf cart, Jordan's other close friend Jason Harman is in the background)

Trust Fund

A trust fund has been set up.
Mingo Family Trust fund.
At any Wells Fargo Bank.
The monies will be for Shelley and her three children.
Chantel - 4 years old
Mason - 2 years old
Landon - 3 months old.

Heartfelt thank you

Goes to the:
IDAHO CIVIL AIR PATROL
with Dave Guzman as the commander.
Thank you for your tireless efforts.
Thank you for finding the plane...a 'needle in the haystack'.
Your work as 'search and rescue' was conducted so kindly and professionally in our behalf.
Thank you for working all day - until the job was done.
Thank you for helping us.
Thank you for bringing our 'boys' home.
THANK YOU!
Sincerely,
Shelley Mingo
Bev Harman

Today is a hard day.

Arlene here:
I just talked to Bev.
She said, "Today is a hard day."
Many decisions to make.
Words we don't imagine using when we are in our 20's ...like funeral, memorial service, burial, casket. Those words.
Because it is three men involved.
Because there is much to consider and coordinate - the plans for the 'services' are still pending.

Because our families believe life is eternal.
Because we believe that families are forever.
Because of love and eternal covenants.
Because a prophet of God said these words,
"The veil which separates us from the Spirit world sometimes seems very thin to us..however, surely those who have passed beyond, can see more clearly through the veil back here to us...I believe we move and have our being in the presence of heavenly beings....We are close to our kindred...I claim we live in their presence, they see us, they are solicitous of our welfare, they love us now more than ever."
(Joseph F Smith - Gospel Doctrine pg 429)
Because of these words...we know there is comfort.

BUT - I also....
believe today is a hard day...............on both sides of the veil.
I believe Jordan - Jed - Ron are having a hard day.

Today is a hard day.